Saturday, December 13, 2008

In the beginning...

As I sit here and pull at my beard (an obvious catalyst to thinking), I take a look at the past year, and I want to say that, well, a lot of things have changed...just one short year. To think that human civilization has spanned somewhere around ten thousand times that amount makes you feel quite miniscule indeed, but in the end, it's really the small things that count...even stars are made of the tiniest atoms. And it's the small things that someone does for someone else that often build the foundation of any relationship. And so, accumulations of any number of these fleeting events (some with bigger consequences than others) have led to the development of the current, rather exciting (occassionally hectic) situation. For those of you who don't know, Kim and I are going to be parents, mother and father, maw and paw, mere et pere, madre y padre, mom n pop, mutter und vater, get the point.

So...I ponder...what does this really mean? Where will this take me? Where will this take Kim? Will she be able to put up with my incessant nagging? What challenges must we face, what kind of madness lies around the corner for us? Stay tuned next week...'s what you make of it...some of the happiest people are completely out of their ghourd. At any rate, it's going to be difficult to explain how the situation is affecting me (let alone Kim) and what it all means in such ephemeral discourse, but I'll do my's enough to drive you up a wall at times, but, in reality, it is simply a challenge, inexorable and invigorating. Life comes at you and if you're not careful, you're going to get hit - so make sure you're ready - pull it in close and spin around with it (I like to spin). When life throws poop at you, then fertilize your garden! Poop is the best fertilizer...all natural and whatnot.

Really though, the initial shock has worn off, and the garden has been to speak...and now we wait...and what an adventure that is! I use the term waiting loosely, because it is more of findaplacetoliveandgeteverythingreadystilltryingtogetworkdonetryingtogetachancetobreathing ... which reminds me of taekwondo practice. Sometimes Master Pak lets you breathe, but it is juuuuuust long enough so that you don't pass out in the next few rounds up and down the floor, and the more you do it, the better you get at catching your breath. It is happy, and it is scary, it is stressful, yet relieving...especially to know that I am not alone. It is exhausting at times and exhilarating at others. Yet, still, I don't think it has sunk in all the way.

Some days I can barely hold it in. Kim (for all the times I am driven to meaningless hair pulling by her unrelenting swarms of homework) is such an amazing person. As happy as I would be to point them out, I won't go into the myriad reasons she is such a fantastic person (and lover ;))...if you know her, then you know already how great she is, and if you don't, well, then, you're missing out. Besides, this thing is going to be long enough as it is. You all are lucky I don't go off on a tirade about robots and aliens and lasers or something anyway, so ha! Honestly, though, I couldn't ask for more. She's a different breed of nerd than I am, but, then, you can't build a picture puzzle with just one type of piece, we just happen to be two right next to each other...probably an edge and a corner...because those are the tastiest ones... and's the small things she does that let me know...ugh...sorry to get all sappy on you, the reader that is reading this blog at this very moment. How are you by the way? Doing all right, there? Did I just break the fourth wall...or is that the wrong terminology? much for staying on topic.

Where was I? Kim? Baby? Life? Family? Friends? I am grateful that everyone has shown so much support for those people, I offer my sincere all are like the rest of the puzzle. I cannot put into words my appreciation, so, I will most likely put it into beer and snacks, and maybe a few rounds of brawl for those who need it the most (Jesse).

This is the beginning of the rest of our lives, this is the start of a family - everything from extraordinary to mundane - holidays and traditions, vacations, taking trips to the park, making breakfast in the morning, bedtime at night, doing chores, having unexpected adventures (hopefully not too many requiring the cleansing of any number of the diverse array of bodily emissions), craft projects, taking pictures, smiling, wondering, a whole lotta love, and the compulsory frustration, joy, and exuberance that comes with it all, ultimately harboring some of life's most valuable experiences. All the small things...everything we all adds up...and right now, if I am any good at math, I'd say it comes out to be pretty well priceless.

If you stuck around to read this whole thing, then this is for you - Robots are the way of the future...or telekinetic/telepathic humans - sensitives. I'm not sure which. Right now it's leaning more towards robots, but aliens could come at any time and disrupt anything...something to think about. I think being telekinetic would be pretty freakin' awesome, personally. I would get a sword...and use it to deflect bullets...with my mind...yes! That would kick ass!

Well, I think that's everything. As a final note, I would like to welcome you, the reader, to the chronicles of our adventure. Think of it as a work in progress, that...really never quite gets finished, and has minimal editing... So...get ready...for non-stop excitement...unbelievable sights...incredibly realistic special effects...dynamic lighting...featuring an eighty eight-time award-winning director...five hundred and seventy two oscar winning actors and actresses...IN...the lowest budget...production ever producted! We proudly present...for your twisted, morbid, and understandably human curiosity, a Kim and Jared production.


...I am really going to need to figure out how to post more than text in these things...KIM!!!


anand jay said...

yay!! i love you two-dudes-soon-to-be-three-dudes. i can't wait to read more about your process and see scanned images of sonograms and pictures of the house and the yard and the dog and everything. i am of course at your beck and call, and i will drive to ames at the drop of a hat if i can be of any help.


Its dangerous business walking... said...

psssht, get your ass here then!!!! ;) kidding.

Running the gauntlet naked said...

WHAT!?!?! Really, Anand, are you serious? Then...uhhhh...if you could scrape out the crawlspace...ummmm...yeah...that would be great...I got some dental tools you can use to do it. =)

Amesbond007 said...

So...You want some suggestions of possible pictures or other things you can post on this?

How about a side view of you, I am really curious to see if you are getting big or not. lol seriously.

Maybe the Dr. will let you record the heart beat.

Also, you have got to get 3d pictures.

How is its room should totally go with a mad scientist on a bicycle theme, or a karate artist.

Actually, I really think that galactic robots would be cool.

Amesbond007 said...
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